Thursday, July 1, 2010

"Applied Lungionics"

Lungi (a.k.a Dothi, the white brother) is a strategic dress. It's like a one size fit all pajama for Keralites.

Wearing something on the top half of your body is optional when you are wearing a lungi. This is the reason why females are not found wearing this awesome dress.

The technique of wearing a lungi/mundu is passed on from generation to generation through verbal communication. If you think it is an easy task to wear it. you are wrong! It requires lot of techniques, including breathe control. A lungi/mundu when perfectly worn won't come off even if it shows 8 on the richter scale.

A lungi is not attached to the waist using duct tape, staple, rope or velcro. it's a bit of mallu magic whose formula is a closely guarded secret like that of Coca Cola ingredients

"Wearing a lungi and managing to keep it up there is tougher than flying a MIG. I can fly a MIG with eyes closed, but not wear a lungi. (a retired MIG pilot)


A lungi can be worn 'FULL MAST' or 'Half Mast'. Like the flags of nation flown at different heights. Wearing it at full mast has lots of disadvantages, rather than advantages. A major disadvantage can be experienced when the neighbour dog runs after you or on a rainy day.

A mallu can play cricket, foot ball or any ball when the lungi is worn in half mast. A mallu can even climb a coconut tree by wearing lungi in half mast. "It's not a good idea to look up on a mallu when he is on a coconut tree"

The 'Lungi Wearing Mallu Union' [LUWMU, pronounced LUV-MU], a union which works towards the 'upliftment' of lungi cult, strongly disagree the younger generation's trend of wearing Burmuda under the lungi. They say that making youngsters wear Burmuda under the lungi is a hidden agenda by the CIA.

A malayali wears lungi round the year, all climates, all seasons. It's like a second skin. Unlike 'summer dress', 'monsoon fashion' etc etc a mallu has one fashion only! Lungi fashion that does not fade or change from season to season.

A lungi/mundu can be worn any time of the day/night. [Some double it as blanket at night.] It also doubles up as swimwear, parachute, facemask, shopping basket, water filter, sleeping bag , a swing. etc etc. When these lungi's are decommissioned from service, they become table cloths.. Hmm. ..The options are endless. There is a new subject in colleges called "Applied Lungionics'.

According to some reports the reason behind the low productivity in kerala is due to the fact that 80% of the productive working hour is spend for wearing the lungi at half mast.

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